At times I have wondered if women’s roles and responsibilities – and women themselves – are less important to God since they are mentioned relatively infrequently in scripture. But I know that can’t be true because I feel the Lord’s love and esteem for me and for all His daughters. Still I wonder if the gospel could not be taught just as well through the perspectives and experiences of women along with those of men. When I pray and ask Father in Heaven to help me understand why the scriptures are the way they are, He first reminds me that He is perfectly just. There is no injustice in Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, so when something in God’s plan seems unfair to me it is because of my limited perspective. Then the Lord reminds me that He does not rate importance the same way the world does. He tells us, “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isaiah 55:9). The world equates worldly prominence and recognition with importance, but that is not the Lord’s way. Every knee did not bow to the Son of God during His mortal life – that comes later (Isaiah 45:23). So women who follow His way should not be surprised if we do not receive full recognition for our work here in mortality, important though it may be.
Another lesson comes from remembering the purpose of scripture: “But these are written, that you might believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God; and that believing ye might have life through his name” (John 20:31, 1 Nephi 19:18, preface to Book of Mormon). The Lord makes it very clear that all people are invited to receive this gift of life through Christ: “He inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female” (2 Nephi 26:33). Though many righteous people and their significant responsibilities are recorded in scripture, the ultimate purpose of scripture is not to honor them over those who are not mentioned; it is to persuade us all to believe in and be saved through Christ. Our ultimate goal is not to have a place in scripture; it is to receive eternal life, which is the greatest of God’s gifts (D&C 66:12, Romans 6:23), the ultimate happiness (Moses 5:11) and the goal of the plan of salvation (Moses 1:39). The Spirit confirms that the relatively few references to women in scripture do not mean that women are less righteous or less important than men in accomplishing God’s work.
The Lord also reminds me that He has given women the gift of being especially sensitive to nuance and to the Spirit. As mothers learn to keep one part of their mind listening for the waking cry of a sleeping baby, they also cultivate their ability to always have one part of their mind listening for the guidance of the Holy Ghost. As mothers develop their capacity to be sensitive and responsive to the needs of their children – even when those needs are not expressed verbally – they also nurture their gift of being sensitive and responsive to the promptings of the Spirit – even when that inspiration is not expressed in words. These gifts help us understand truths even when they are not spelled out plainly or repeatedly, and they more than compensate for the extra work we have to do to apply male perspectives and experiences in scripture to our own lives.
As I study the scriptures for subtle confirmations of God’s appreciation and honor for women and their responsibilities, I find plenty of evidence. The Lord established the importance of righteous wives and mothers in the life of the prophet Abraham, who sent a trusted servant far away to find a faithful woman to be the wife of the chosen son, Isaac. When this servant prayed for a sign to identify the right woman, the Lord acknowledged the importance of his task by guiding Rebekah to fulfill the sign (Genesis 24). Through Isaac and Rebekah the covenant promises of the Lord to Abraham were and continue to be fulfilled. It feels very significant to me that Jesus’ mother was given a place in Nephi’s vision about the love of God (1 Nephi 11). She stood as a first witness of God’s love, just as mothers have throughout history and continue to do today. Though we do not find much information about their mothers, we see that the miracles that blessed the 2,000 stripling warriors occurred because of the foundation of faith and obedience laid by these faithful women (Alma 56:47-48, Alma 57:21).
Many confirmations of God’s respect for womanhood and much guidance on how to fulfill our roles come from the example of Jesus during His mortal ministry. The book of John has been described as God’s love letter to His children, and I feel this especially applies to His daughters. John records that the “beginning of miracles” occurred in response to a request from Jesus’ mother, Mary. It is helpful to note the clarification from Joseph Smith about Jesus’ response to her request, “Woman, what wilt thou have me do for thee? that will I do; for mine hour is not yet come” (John 2:4, Joseph Smith Translation). Surely the One who gave the commandment to honor both father and mother (Exodus 20:12) would speak to His own mother with great respect. Can you imagine how noble and revered the word ‘woman’ must sound when He speaks it? Mary Magdalene was honored to stand as the first mortal witness of Christ's resurrection at the completion of the Atonement, the most significant event to occur in all of history (John 20:11-18). John’s teachings on the importance of charity, or Godly love, gain greater meaning for women when we remember that the prophet Mormon used a female pronoun to describe charity (Moroni 7:45), and the motto of the church’s organization for women is ‘Charity Never Faileth.’ When we enlist the guidance of the Holy Ghost and search the scriptures for the Lord’s perspective on women, He will guide us to truths we have not noticed before. While the scriptural references to women may seem small and simple (Alma 37:6), the Lord through His Spirit is prepared to make up for the lack of detail and truly bring about great things in the hearts and lives of His beloved daughters.
Showing posts with label Mothering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mothering. Show all posts
April 15, 2014
March 20, 2014
Stand As Witnesses of God's Love
Each Sunday young women across the church recite the promise that they will “stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places" (Young Women Theme, Mosiah 18:9). These beloved daughters of God are preparing to fulfill the important missions He has assigned to them. As I ponder the importance of sacrifice in divine love, I realize that the Lord has entrusted each mother with the responsibility to stand as the first witness of His love to her children. Even before our babies are born, we witness of the Savior’s selfless love when we endure morning sickness, overwhelming fatigue and the painfully stretched body that is required to create a physical body for them. We testify that our Savior loved us enough to suffer for us while we labor to give our children birth. We teach of God’s constant loving care while nursing babies in the middle of the night, even as we weep in the darkness from exhaustion. A mother’s tenderness prepares her children to recognize the tender mercies (Psalms 145:9, 1 Nephi 1:20) of the Lord throughout their lives. In His perfect plan, our Heavenly Father ordained that children would experience His love from the very beginning of mortality through their mother. The testimony of mothers stands even stronger when fathers engage in the parenting to stand as additional witnesses of God’s love.
The prophet Nephi was given a vision about the love of God (1 Nephi 11) when he approached the Lord with his questions about a similar vision given to his father. Nephi saw a beautiful tree, and when he asked for the interpretation, he was first shown the mother of Jesus. Then he saw scenes from Jesus’ ministry, including His death. In this vision Mary stood as a first witness of God’s love, and all mothers have the opportunity to follow her example and testify through our lives of the selfless love of our Savior. Women who do not have the opportunity to become mothers in this life also find ways to stand as witnesses of God’s love and thereby find great purpose and fulfillment. My unmarried sister is a good example to me of this. She nurtures relationships with her nieces and nephews despite the great cost in time and money. She reaches out in love to family members who no longer come to church. If they ever decide to come back, their way will be easier because she has witnessed to them of God’s unfailing love for them. Like my sister, women do not need to wait for marriage and motherhood to begin standing as witnesses of God’s love in ways that bring significant blessings to God’s children.
The worldly voices around us do not encourage women in making sacrifices to stand as witnesses of God’s love. The idea that men’s roles and responsibilities are more important and Godly than women’s roles and responsibilities is confusing to many. Even for good women, it is easy to be swayed by the idea that having children and caring for them is nothing but drudgery, and the important accomplishments in life are found elsewhere. I remember a time during college when I realized how greatly I had been blessed with opportunities to learn. My parents and countless teachers, coaches and other leaders had invested much in my growth. I pondered about why the Lord had granted me so many opportunities to be educated and develop talents. I thought He surely must have some great mission for me to accomplish later in life, but I could not imagine what it might be. Several years later I learned the answer. As I sat on my bed rocking my first newborn baby, the Lord brought that question back to my mind. The warmth of the Spirit wrapped around me and confirmed that this was why the Lord had invested so much in me. I could not perceive it as a college student, but mothering my children was the significant mission that required so much preparation.
How important is the responsibility to teach of God’s love? When Jesus was asked to state the greatest commandment, He responded, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets" (Matthew 22:37-40). Paul taught, "For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love" (Galatians 5:14, also 1 Timothy 1:5). As I ponder these verses, the Lord helps me see how His gospel really does ‘hang on’ or have its basis in love. All of the commandments have charity, or Godly love, as their underpinning – love of God, His love for us, and the charity we feel for our neighbors. The second commandment is interpreted to love our neighbor as we love ourselves, but Jesus taught a higher way to love others. “A new commandment I give unto you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another" (John 13:34). We are to love and serve others as Jesus loved and served, and when we are filled with charity, living His gospel of loving service feels natural.
I remember hearing a counselor talk about the emotional damage people experience when they do not experience love from and develop a strong attachment to a caretaker early in life. I realized that while caring for my little children, I was fulfilling more than just their physical needs. I was also nurturing their capacity to love throughout their lives. The ability to love does not develop in a vacuum. We develop the capacity to love – and live the gospel – by experiencing God’s love, and we do that first through the love of our mothers. How grateful we are for the hope of healing through the Atonement for those who do not receive love early in life. Women have divine gifts that make them especially capable of sharing Christ’s nurturing and healing power with those who have missed out on love in their lives. As mothers we can spare our children much hardship by fulfilling their need to be encircled in the arms of their mother’s love – and thereby in God’s love (2 Nephi 1:15) – from the beginning of life.
Jesus set the perfect example of how to teach of Godly love, or charity. He set aside His great capacities and important responsibilities as “the Father of heaven and earth, the Creator of all things from the beginning” (Helaman 14:12) to come down to earth, live as a mortal, and serve. Throughout His ministry, Jesus made time to minister to individuals, not just large audiences. Mothers follow this pattern when we set aside other talents and opportunities for recognition to care for each of our children. At the last supper, Jesus humbly washed the dirty, smelly feet of the apostles. Does this not parallel the service of mothers who spend their days changing smelly diapers and cleaning up the other messes their little ones make? Is there a more pure way to love “not . . . in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and truth?" (1 John 3:18) Even though Jesus was the Son of God, every knee did not bow to Him during His mortal life – that will come later (Romans 14:11, Mosiah 27:31). So we who follow His way should not be surprised that we do not receive full recognition for our work in this life, important though it is. God always sees and blesses those who serve Him, but often those blessings are not fully manifest until the next life.
In the plan of salvation, women were not assigned the labors of mothering because we were not capable of anything greater. Rather, the Lord expressed great trust in women when He assigned us the crucial responsibility to stand as the first witnesses of His love to our children and thereby introduce them to the Godly love which supports the entire gospel. With this perspective in mind, we understand that every sacrifice that is required of us as women and mothers can prepare us to love as our Savior loves.
The prophet Nephi was given a vision about the love of God (1 Nephi 11) when he approached the Lord with his questions about a similar vision given to his father. Nephi saw a beautiful tree, and when he asked for the interpretation, he was first shown the mother of Jesus. Then he saw scenes from Jesus’ ministry, including His death. In this vision Mary stood as a first witness of God’s love, and all mothers have the opportunity to follow her example and testify through our lives of the selfless love of our Savior. Women who do not have the opportunity to become mothers in this life also find ways to stand as witnesses of God’s love and thereby find great purpose and fulfillment. My unmarried sister is a good example to me of this. She nurtures relationships with her nieces and nephews despite the great cost in time and money. She reaches out in love to family members who no longer come to church. If they ever decide to come back, their way will be easier because she has witnessed to them of God’s unfailing love for them. Like my sister, women do not need to wait for marriage and motherhood to begin standing as witnesses of God’s love in ways that bring significant blessings to God’s children.
The worldly voices around us do not encourage women in making sacrifices to stand as witnesses of God’s love. The idea that men’s roles and responsibilities are more important and Godly than women’s roles and responsibilities is confusing to many. Even for good women, it is easy to be swayed by the idea that having children and caring for them is nothing but drudgery, and the important accomplishments in life are found elsewhere. I remember a time during college when I realized how greatly I had been blessed with opportunities to learn. My parents and countless teachers, coaches and other leaders had invested much in my growth. I pondered about why the Lord had granted me so many opportunities to be educated and develop talents. I thought He surely must have some great mission for me to accomplish later in life, but I could not imagine what it might be. Several years later I learned the answer. As I sat on my bed rocking my first newborn baby, the Lord brought that question back to my mind. The warmth of the Spirit wrapped around me and confirmed that this was why the Lord had invested so much in me. I could not perceive it as a college student, but mothering my children was the significant mission that required so much preparation.
How important is the responsibility to teach of God’s love? When Jesus was asked to state the greatest commandment, He responded, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets" (Matthew 22:37-40). Paul taught, "For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love" (Galatians 5:14, also 1 Timothy 1:5). As I ponder these verses, the Lord helps me see how His gospel really does ‘hang on’ or have its basis in love. All of the commandments have charity, or Godly love, as their underpinning – love of God, His love for us, and the charity we feel for our neighbors. The second commandment is interpreted to love our neighbor as we love ourselves, but Jesus taught a higher way to love others. “A new commandment I give unto you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another" (John 13:34). We are to love and serve others as Jesus loved and served, and when we are filled with charity, living His gospel of loving service feels natural.
I remember hearing a counselor talk about the emotional damage people experience when they do not experience love from and develop a strong attachment to a caretaker early in life. I realized that while caring for my little children, I was fulfilling more than just their physical needs. I was also nurturing their capacity to love throughout their lives. The ability to love does not develop in a vacuum. We develop the capacity to love – and live the gospel – by experiencing God’s love, and we do that first through the love of our mothers. How grateful we are for the hope of healing through the Atonement for those who do not receive love early in life. Women have divine gifts that make them especially capable of sharing Christ’s nurturing and healing power with those who have missed out on love in their lives. As mothers we can spare our children much hardship by fulfilling their need to be encircled in the arms of their mother’s love – and thereby in God’s love (2 Nephi 1:15) – from the beginning of life.
Jesus set the perfect example of how to teach of Godly love, or charity. He set aside His great capacities and important responsibilities as “the Father of heaven and earth, the Creator of all things from the beginning” (Helaman 14:12) to come down to earth, live as a mortal, and serve. Throughout His ministry, Jesus made time to minister to individuals, not just large audiences. Mothers follow this pattern when we set aside other talents and opportunities for recognition to care for each of our children. At the last supper, Jesus humbly washed the dirty, smelly feet of the apostles. Does this not parallel the service of mothers who spend their days changing smelly diapers and cleaning up the other messes their little ones make? Is there a more pure way to love “not . . . in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and truth?" (1 John 3:18) Even though Jesus was the Son of God, every knee did not bow to Him during His mortal life – that will come later (Romans 14:11, Mosiah 27:31). So we who follow His way should not be surprised that we do not receive full recognition for our work in this life, important though it is. God always sees and blesses those who serve Him, but often those blessings are not fully manifest until the next life.
In the plan of salvation, women were not assigned the labors of mothering because we were not capable of anything greater. Rather, the Lord expressed great trust in women when He assigned us the crucial responsibility to stand as the first witnesses of His love to our children and thereby introduce them to the Godly love which supports the entire gospel. With this perspective in mind, we understand that every sacrifice that is required of us as women and mothers can prepare us to love as our Savior loves.
Why So Much Sacrifice?
I had much time to ponder my questions for the Lord while I spent painful months recovering from a surgery that was needed to correct complications from my pregnancies. One day during this time, my wonderful husband was helping our daughter learn how to ride her bike when she twisted the handles sharply and caused them to fall together. He injured his toe and it was sore for several weeks. At one point he expressed frustration that he could not complete the needed training for an upcoming triathlon because his toe was too sore to run. For months I had been barely able to sit up straight because of surgery and other painful complications. I did not feel very impressed with his sacrifice. I wondered again as I had before why so many of the sacrifices of parenting fall heavily on mothers.
Women are strong, but much of our strength goes toward the capacity to bear children instead of building stronger muscles. The resulting disparity in physical strength between women and men has made women vulnerable to oppression and abuse. When women choose to stay at home with their children instead of pursuing a career, they become financially vulnerable. Even women who never have children in this life experience many of the burdens that go along with a body capable of bearing children. Why must this be? Could there not be another way to accomplish God’s plan for us? Is it offensive to the Lord for me to ask Him those questions?
Pondering these things leads me to the words Jesus spoke as He suffered in Gethsemane. “And he went forward a little, and fell on the ground, and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt” (Mark 14:35-36). Even Jesus asked if there might be another way to accomplish God’s plan that did not require His great sacrifice, but there was not. My suffering may have exceeded my husband’s sore toe, but Jesus’ suffering far eclipsed anything I have experienced. What did He know and understand that made Him willing to sacrifice so much? What must I know and understand to enable me to sacrifice willingly as Jesus did?
John wrote of the answer: “Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoso . . . seeth his brother hath need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?” (1 John 3:16-17) Love is the reason Jesus suffered willingly – love for His Heavenly Father and love for us. And you and I cannot understand His love without knowing sacrifice.
A favorite hymn teaches that “sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven" (Praise to the Man, LDS Hymnbook, p. 27). Jesus suffered the Atonement to bring about great blessings for all of God’s children. The Lord swells my heart with the truth that I follow my Savior’s example through my mothering sacrifices and thereby bring about great blessings for my children and for me. He reassures me that He does not mind my questions when I come ready to listen to the answers. In fact, I feel that He welcomes these conversations and the chance to teach me through the Spirit.
Women are strong, but much of our strength goes toward the capacity to bear children instead of building stronger muscles. The resulting disparity in physical strength between women and men has made women vulnerable to oppression and abuse. When women choose to stay at home with their children instead of pursuing a career, they become financially vulnerable. Even women who never have children in this life experience many of the burdens that go along with a body capable of bearing children. Why must this be? Could there not be another way to accomplish God’s plan for us? Is it offensive to the Lord for me to ask Him those questions?
Pondering these things leads me to the words Jesus spoke as He suffered in Gethsemane. “And he went forward a little, and fell on the ground, and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt” (Mark 14:35-36). Even Jesus asked if there might be another way to accomplish God’s plan that did not require His great sacrifice, but there was not. My suffering may have exceeded my husband’s sore toe, but Jesus’ suffering far eclipsed anything I have experienced. What did He know and understand that made Him willing to sacrifice so much? What must I know and understand to enable me to sacrifice willingly as Jesus did?
John wrote of the answer: “Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoso . . . seeth his brother hath need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?” (1 John 3:16-17) Love is the reason Jesus suffered willingly – love for His Heavenly Father and love for us. And you and I cannot understand His love without knowing sacrifice.
A favorite hymn teaches that “sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven" (Praise to the Man, LDS Hymnbook, p. 27). Jesus suffered the Atonement to bring about great blessings for all of God’s children. The Lord swells my heart with the truth that I follow my Savior’s example through my mothering sacrifices and thereby bring about great blessings for my children and for me. He reassures me that He does not mind my questions when I come ready to listen to the answers. In fact, I feel that He welcomes these conversations and the chance to teach me through the Spirit.
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